My new book comes out on February 7th. It’s called Power Questions: Build Relationships, Win New Business, and Influence Others.

Why a book about questions?

Good questions challenge your thinking. They reframe and redefine the problem. They throw cold water on our most dearly-held assumptions, and force us out of our traditional thinking. They motivate us to learn and discover more. They remind us of what is most important in our lives.

It can and does happen even to top performers: You see the axe falling on others, but you know it couldn’t happen to you. You’ve consistently gotten good performance reviews, and you play a key role in your organization. Your job is important! Yet…you now realize there may be some subtle, almost unnoticeable warning signs that you are ignoring or dismissing.

It has happened and will happen to every professional who deals with clients: something goes wrong or your client gets upset about something you've done or said. Here are eight tips for dealing with an unhappy client and starting the process of resolution:

Do you ever have the nagging feeling that you don’t have time to really think anymore? You’re not alone. A variety of factors have conspired to rob us of time for reflection about ourselves, our lives, and the problems and issues that our clients face.

Some businesses are very hard to interact with. I have dealt with insurance companies, for example, which seem to put up barriers to prevent customers from talking to people who can actually solve their problem. If you buy a consumer product, like a camera or software program, and it breaks, good luck trying to call the manufacturer.

Once you have acquired a new client, the next challenge is to create a personal connection and deepen the relationship. The right power questions will help you do this.  I like to ask what I call Passion questions and Depth questions.

Sometimes it can feel like buyers have the upper hand. They have many service providers to choose from. Everyone calls on them and aggressively pitches for their business. How can you be viewed as a peer, as someone who has something valuable to offer, rather than a commodity vendor? Thoughtful power questions can help you earn greater respect immediately. 

Do you ever find that you are slogging through meeting after meeting with a prospect, month after month, without reaching a sale? You have lots of conversations, but there is no forward progress. In today’s economy, there are in fact lots of sales conversations that go on and on without ever arriving anywhere. You can avoid this by asking a series of incisive questions that help you verify if the preconditions for a sale are present. 

May 28th of this year is Memorial Day in the United States, a day of remembrance for those who gave their lives in war. My mother and my father both served extended combat tours in World War II. My mother was a Lieutenant in the US Army–a nurse.  She followed the troops into the Continent from D-Day onwards.

Unfortunately,  the easiest and most direct way to increase value (which is benefits  minus price paid) is to pressure a service provider to lower their fees.  Remember, too, that clients ask for discounts for different reasons. I  have observed no less than five types of clients who ask for discounts: